Father And Son Start Uber-Air Service From Compton Airport

Mr. Jenkins and his son Mr. Jenkins Jr. will be offering Uber flights from the Compton Airport.
Photo by B. Bowlin-Nightus Press

In a giant step for ride share service Uber, a father and son team from Compton, CA. are starting an Uber air service for those taking short trips. Mr. Jenkins and his son Mr. Jenkins Jr. will begin offering low cost flights in their Cessna 175 Skylark aircraft. “Traffic in L.A. is so bad, it’s worth it to fly” said Mr. Jenkins Sr. “By the time you burn up gas sitting in traffic, pay for blood pressure medication because traffic gets your pressure up, pay for the damage to your car from some fool without insurance because you don’t want your rates to go up, and the $100 a month you spend on parking tickets from expired meters or whatever the hell that confusing sign said…..you might as well fly.”

Mr. Jenkins Jr. gave another reason for using Uber-Air. “We go anywhere in California, Nevada and Arizona. You ain’t gotta deal with SouthWest Airlines no more, you ain’t gotta be on a train or with all of the sex offenders, meth heads and flu ridden sex offenders and meth heads on a Greyhound.” Uber-Air prices start at “What you got? We’ll work with ya.” to $1,000.00 depending on how far you’re going. Mr. Jenkins and Mr. Jenkins Jr. have made it clear that they are not like traditional airlines. Before boarding at the Compton Airport there is a sign greeting passengers:

Welcome to Uber-Air. We hope you enjoy your travel. Just so that we’re clear… ain’t gonna be:

No comfort or therapy pets. If you ain’t comfortable, find another way to get where you going. If you’re blind, that’s different otherwise keep that dumb, untrained dog in a carrying case or at home.

No playing music or watching videos on your phone without earbuds. We don’t wanna hear all that, we trying to listen to the control tower.

No EBT, pay apps, checks or I’mma get at you on payday. Full payment is due BEFORE you board.

No parents who can’t control their kids. We’re trynna fly a plane, don’t make us come back there.

Mr. Jenkins Sr. says that Red Vines will be provided for regular passengers and Popeyes chicken sandwiches will be provided for First Class passengers who pay an additional $12. Download the Uber-Air App from the Yellow Pages. They ain’t got time to be fooling around on the internet.

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John Moody

Author: John Moody

John B. Moody is a comedic performer, writer, and Executive Publisher of The Urban Beet. He also hosts the Dear John Podcast. Please send questions, comments or marriage proposals to the email address he provided when you met.
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