Man Dressed As Santa Claus Goes To Strip Club And Refuses To Pay For Lap Dances

Atlanta, Georgia- 36 year old Nick Saints went into the world famous Magic City strip club wearing a Santa Claus suit. He ordered a drink and began receiving lap dances from every stripper working that night. Because he took Christmas wishes from the young ladies while they were on his lap, Mr. Saints says he was serving as Santa Claus and shouldn’t have to pay for the lap dances. The strippers felt otherwise. “He better have a whole bunch of one dollar bills in that bag” said Cristal, one of the exotic dancers who gave a Christmas wish. Gucci Guurrl another dancer at the club also chimed in. “I wished for a leather bound Bible and a Mercedes with a cross as a hood ornament. If I get that he can keep the $20. Otherwise that’s gonna be his ass.”

Club bouncer Colin Parker said this was unusual. “Normally, if somebody doesn’t pay, we beat that ass and throw them out but this was Santa Claus. Cameras are everywhere and Santa being stomped out at your establishment isn’t a good look. We had to let him walk.” Mr. Saints was charged with theft of services in the order of $700 worth of lap dances. Mr. Parker sighed “It’s gonna be a long night. You know how many *****s are gonna be dressed as Santa Claus tonight?”

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John Moody

Author: John Moody

John B. Moody is a comedic performer, writer, and Executive Publisher of The Urban Beet. He also hosts the Dear John Podcast. Please send questions, comments or marriage proposals to the email address he provided when you met.
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